One of my oldest friends is having a baby. She’s not really the girly-girl, baby shower type (I don’t think she had a bridal shower, and her wedding rehearsal was on the beach two hours before the ceremony itself – everyone just showed up to the rehearsal in their swimsuits). So, she was definitely not thrilled about sitting through three hours of games and blue balloons (she’s having a boy).
Oh, and did I mention this party started at 5 pm and included alcoholic beverages? I wanted to hug her.
Anyway, I tried to find gifts that would least cause her to freak out. I realize that I am going to soon become known as Spinster Auntie Jen, because I gave the Monkey (as he’s now known) books. Yes, that’s right – I bought books for someone who won’t be able to read for at least four years. Jake did his part and gave a doggy bank full of change. Oh, and I bought Peepee Teepees. they are absolutely necessary for anyone who’s about to have a boy.
So, the list of spinster gifts:
- Doggy bank filled with coins (from spinster’s sidekick, Jake)
- Snowy Day, by Ezra Jack Keats
- 365 Penguins, by Jean-Luc Fromental and Joëlle Jolivet
- Monster, Don’t Eat Me, by Carl Norac and Carll Cneut
- Pet Show, by Ezra Jack Keats
- Three Martini Playdate, by Christine Mellor
- The Lazy Husband, by Joshua Coleman (I must say here that Monkey’s dad is one of the least lazy husbands I know of; also, apparently gag gifts don’t go over so well at baby showers.)
- Pack of Peepee Teepees in camouflage
- Pin that says “Stop crying, Emo kid.”
All lovingly wrapped in whatever paper I had in the house. I was finally able to finish off the industrial-sized roll of paper I bought from Kelly Paper four years ago!
All accomplished with minimal cutesiness on my part, and very little freak-out on the mom-to-be’s part.